Home is what’s in your heart: Alla Barvinok and her son’s story of returning from abroad
When the full-scale invasion began, Alla Barvinok from Ladyzhyn in Vinnytsia region worried not so much about herself as about her daughter Nataliia, who was living in Kyiv at the time. News about Bucha and Irpin hurt every day, adding anxiety and exhaustion.
“The only thing we thought about then was how to save our child,” she recalls.
Eventually, circumstances allowed 23-year-old Natalka to leave the capital and then go abroad. Today Alla’s daughter lives in the south of Denmark, in the city of Kolding.
“My daughter adapted quite quickly, as she speaks English well. We have been communicating online all this time. We have seen each other four times, when she came home,” says her mother. “Now we are waiting for her to come again.”
Meanwhile, Alla Barvinok stayed in her hometown with her 19-year-old son. Oleksii has a disability. He was diagnosed with cerebral palsy as a small child.
“My son became very anxious. The shelling, which also reached our region, affected his emotional state. So we began thinking about going abroad too,” Alla continues.
The evacuation was organised by the Obrii Vinnytsia Regional Centre for Social and Psychological Rehabilitation of Children and Young People with Functional Limitations.
That is how the mother and son ended up in The Hague, in the Netherlands.
“There we received housing, support and adapted conditions. I was at peace knowing my children were safe. But over time, there was a feeling that everything seemed fine, but we were not at home,” she admits.
Ms Alla says the absence of her husband, relatives and familiar surroundings was also strongly felt.
“There wasn’t enough support, inner stability,” she continues.
After seven and a half months in the Netherlands, Alla began to think seriously about returning. The decision was not spontaneous. She weighed all the factors – safety, her son’s needs, living conditions.
At first, Oleksii was against it – he liked Europe, where they had managed to travel a little and see the world. But he still agreed with his mother that home is home.
“Here I have everything: my husband is always nearby, our home, car, parents, neighbours… Here I am the mistress of the house,” she says.
In Ukraine, despite all the challenges, the family feels confident.
At the same time, Alla speaks frankly about problems that need attention – in particular, the accessibility of the environment for people with disabilities.
“My son has used a wheelchair all his life. Abroad, we felt how important accessibility is. In Ukraine, there is still work to be done. Although we have already learned to adapt, for many people this problem remains critical,” she states.
During her time abroad, Alla saw different stories: some stayed because they had nowhere to return to, others returned because they felt that no country could replace home.
For her, the decision was clear: home is what’s in your heart.
The project “Strengthening Community Resilience for Return and Reintegration” is implemented by the Rokada Charitable Foundation as part of the project “YOUA – Shaping New Paths, Building Ukraine’s Future”, commissioned by the German Government and implemented by GIZ Ukraine.
The YOUA project provides exclusively technical assistance and does not influence people’s personal decisions about returning to Ukraine. Participation in events and use of services are possible exclusively on a voluntary basis for persons who are considering returning, have already made such a decision or are in the process of reintegration after returning to Ukraine.
